Billboards all over the tri-state area keep reminding me that prom season is coming. With prom season comes awkwardly terrible stories about prom sex. As a reminder, prom sex is only a movie trope and probably nothing that you will ever remember doing a few months after the fact.
My senior prom was on my 18th birthday, that was why I wanted to have sex on prom night. It was like having the biggest party I had ever thrown (at the time) only over ¾ of the people in attendance were people who I didn’t like and the other ¼ of the people didn’t like me. It was a bit strange and expensive. I wanted to fuck on prom night though, mostly because Hollywood movies told me that’s what I should want to do.
I made my prom dress myself, threw on some black lipstick, had my aunt do my hair and headed off to the dance with my boyfriend in my ‘82 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme. It was primer grey and had a massive back seat that I hated giving blowjobs in.
Twenty years after the fact, I remember zero about the dance itself. Stupid things about who was going to be sitting at my table and what color my nails were going to be painted seemed so important at the time, but they weren’t.
The saving grace to the evening was that I somehow convinced my mother to rent a room for my boyfriend and I in the hotel where the prom was held. Reflecting back, I have zero idea how I manipulated that situation to be in my favor. I know I paid for the hotel room with my own money, but I needed a credit card to actually make the reservation, so my mom had to be involved somehow. I reasoned with her that everyone else was going to be going to parties that my boyfriend and I weren’t invited to, which was totally true. If I had to guess, I’d say that my mom felt bad about the fact that I didn’t have very many friends so she caved after only a handful of asks.
After the prom was over, I headed upstairs with my boyfriend and another couple that we were friends with. They headed to the bathroom and my boyfriend and I confusedly watched television in bed while we waited for them to finish up. Honestly, I think I probably could have had a prom night orgy (or at least two couples in the same room having sex at the same time) if I had played my cards right, or even known that I was into kinky shit like that.
My boyfriend and I fucked with these bright red condoms that he bought especially for the occasion. I rode his cock, like I always did, and we passed out until morning. It’s interesting that I don’t actually remember the sex itself, but I remember what color the condom was so vividly.
I was reading through the prom sex stories linked in the Refinery 29 article linked below and realized that mine was a better experience than most. I didn’t have to sneak away or keep quiet because I was fucking in someone else’s basement. I was able to scream like a pornstar because that’s how I thought sex was supposed to sound.
I’m glad that I know better than that now.
Here’s a prom sex fantasy for you to enjoy:
Tell me about your prom sex experience in the comments below or get in touch on twitter if you’d like to keep things more private.
Image: Prom Whore Wars 3 by Brazzers